Isn’t it insane how love works? I say that yet…no one truly knows how love works. We can love so many people in so many different ways; each love and relationship is different. The possibilities are literally endless. We love our family, our friends, our pets…but what about when we fall in love? I don’t mean lust or ‘puppy love.’ I mean the punch you in the gut, make you fly, ruin your life kind of love. Suddenly your palms are always sweaty, you can’t sleep, you can’t eat…it’s such a sweet nightmare. Have you ever been there? I have. Have you been there more than once? I have. Yet each love was different. Once you find that connection that feels like fireworks in your chest, you think you’ll never find it again. But I did. I never thought, in a million years, it would happen. Yet one day I found myself kissing my best friend and realizing I had been in love with him for years. How was that possible, and how had I not realized it before? It’s the kind of love story that slowly developed over time and then turned into this fiery, passionate, knee trembling, all encompassing love. I was baffled because I never thought I would love like that again. But it wasn’t the same, it was still a little different. My first love was like a movie in every way. It was all passion and drama all the time, I was addicted. I was a teenage girl with stars in my eyes for him. I thought he made my world turn, and for awhile he did. Eventually that relationship ended, as most do. I never really stopped loving him, and tried to make it work again years later, even though it didn’t. Yet, I found another love.
So my question is this; once you fall in love that first time, do you ever fall out of it? Can you go from one to another without holding onto the first one a little bit? How do you let go of something like that? I think we choose to move on, and we choose to be with other people, but we never stop loving one another. Some part of that passion and fire keeps burning forever.
Like I said, it’s just that crazy love thing.